The Thinning Line Between
by Rivendell101
Summary: He doesn't know if she can hear him or not. Hell, he doesn't know if she even realizes he's there at this point, she's too far gone, but he still tried. He tried and he tried. And he tries because she means something to him. And it kills him inside that he doesn't know how to save her. Not this time. Hiatus
1. Prologue:Break Down

**Full summary: **

He doesn't know if she can hear him or not. Hell, he doesn't know if she even realizes he's there at this point, she's too far gone, but he still tried. He tried and he tried. And he _tries_ because she means something to him. And it kills him inside that he doesn't know _how_ to save her.

"There was an accident." An accident doesn't even describe what happened. She's seeing and hearing things that can't possibly be there and he can't save her. Not this time. Her sanity is slipping away and so is he. He's slipping away with her.

All because of one mission that fucked up.

When the line between fantasy and reality starts to blur what do you do?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor do I own the song **_**Breakdown**_** by Daughtry that is used as the chapter title. **

**The Thinning Line Between**

**Prologue: Breakdown**

Ino didn't know what she was doing anymore. Not since the mission that ruined everything. Not since the elders had decided she was too _damaged_ on the inside to continue being a ninja. Not since they told her that her mind was too _fucking_ messed up to continue doing anything. Not that they said it out laud, but she was a Yamanaka and _damn her to hell_ if she didn't know what they were actually thinking when they told her the news.

She wasn't crazy. At least she didn't think she was. She saw things; heard things that she knew weren't actually there. There was the jutsu that would last as long as the caster held it. Or was alive long enough to hold it. She wasn't crazy, she wasn't _sick_, she just needed help. She needed the mind jutsu to be lifted, soon.

Not many people knew what was wrong. Besides Lady Tsunade there were only two people who knew what was going on with her. No three. She told Sakura. Didn't she? Or maybe she only thought she told Sakura. But than again if she did tell Sakura then Naruto probably had some sort of idea of what was actually happening.

So it was four. Or maybe it was two.

She knew that Shikamaru and Choji knew fully well what was wrong with her. They were part of the backup team that had found her and her two teammates, who were already dead, during the mission. They were there when Lady Tsunade told her the truth of what would happen. And they were there when she had Lady Tsunade promise to 'safely remove of her' if she should hurt someone. They were her teammates, of course they knew.

But could she even believe that? Maybe she was still lying out in the middle of the woods with _his_ hand still pressed against her head. Maybe he was still looking down at her, telling her it would only hurt a little and then she wouldn't feel it. She was sure she was going to die then. She was sure of it. Hell, she would have _welcomed_ it.

But then Shikamaru was leaning over her his eyes full of fear, calling for Sakura to help, and pleading with her to stay alive, to just hold on a little longer. And then he was _screaming_ for Sakura to hurray because she was slipping away.

Or maybe that hadn't actually happened, but would death really take this long if she was still lying on the ground? She didn't know.

Ino was startled out of her reverie when a warm body slipped down onto the floor next to her. When did she end up on the floor? She didn't need to turn and look to know who the lean body that was next to her belonged to. She already knew.

She placed her head against his shoulder, his arm already moving to curl around her in return. "What am I going to do Shikamaru?"

Shikamaru only sighed and pulled her that much closer to him, breathing her in. She could imagine the frown that marred his face in that moment, probably matching her own, and the movement of his eyebrows narrowing in either thought or anger, maybe both.

"I don't know Ino." She felt him sigh rather than hearing it. "I just don't know."

And that's what scared her more than anything, the fact that Shikamaru didn't know what to do. She wasn't helpless, far from it, but Shikamaru always had some sort of plan. A way out, if you will.

But not this time, no, not this time. Right now he was just as lost and confused as she was. Maybe even more than she was, but she didn't want to think like that. Because if she couldn't trust Shikamaru than who could she trust?

She only shook her head, she shouldn't be thinking like this. She had people who cared. There were two… no… maybe four people who knew what was happening and would try and help.

And then her father walked in and Shikamaru was gone. Well he didn't _walk_ in, he was _dead_. And Shikamaru was still there, she could still feel the light tug of his arm around her. But she saw him walk in and smile, and she _knew_ this was just the jutsu taking affect again. Her father couldn't possibly he in the room _alive _and smiling at her. He was dead; she knew that, everyone knew that. And then he was talking, and how could any of this actually be real?

What if she actually was still in the woods imagining all of this? And Shikamaru and Choji and Sakura were too late, and she's still bleeding out, and Akimitsu and Shinji are still dead anyway so either way it doesn't matter for them, their fates had been sealed.

But than she realizes that for her to actually determine reality from fantasy she actually has to be awake and alive at some point. So no, she isn't still in the woods, Shikamaru, Choji, and Sakura _did_ make it in time, she stopped bleeding out, and either way Akimitsu and Shinji are dead.

And then, just as suddenly as it was there, it was gone. The memory, or illusion, or whatever the _fuck_ it really was, and she was sitting on the floor of the flower shop, Shikamaru was right next to her, and her father was gone.

And everything was just as it was five minutes ago or maybe it was less time. It was hard to tell time when you kept slipping in and out of reality.

And she doesn't want to admit what she's been thinking because she knows Shikamaru won't like it and people might just think that yes, she is crazy, but she just doesn't want to hurt anyone.

And well maybe she is crazy. After everything that's happened in the past, what, year? No it was less than a year; anyone might just be driven to madness with all the death they've seen, and all of the bodies that they've seen fall and then had to stare at, wondering if this was someone they cared about. Was this someone _she _knew? Was this someone she cared about more than anything else?

And than she realizes she's trailed off again.

And she can't help but think that things would have been better if she had just died out there.

But, again, she knows this is a selfish thought, and how would it affect everyone else around her? Would it even make some sort of a difference to people? Maybe it would affect four, no two people around her. But they would move on. And she really wasn't that significant anyway.

"I'm sorry." She turned towards Shikamaru as she said it, hoping he would recognize exactly what it was she meant with those two words.

He looked over at her and she saw his gaze soften as he did, "You have nothing to be sorry for." He gave her a reassuring squeeze.

She opened her mouth to reply, to tell him he was wrong and shouldn't be wasting time on her, because this might not even be real, it could all be _fake_, but she manages to catch herself before she says anything more, and it's his _eyes_. They were so sincere at that moment that she thought she might cry, because his eyes _never_ looked like that, and he honestly believed in her. He believed in her and actually thought that she could make it through this, that this whole _mess_ wouldn't crush her.

It was his eyes that gave her the hope she needed to stay strong for that much longer. But how long would it be until she was flooded with everything around her? How long would it be until she did something crazy- or _stupid_ and everything just came crashing down?

Sometimes she really did wonder if things would have been better is she had just died instead of lived. But she _didn't_ die, and she _did_ live. And she wasn't too sure how easy it would be to just cross that thin line.

But which line should she cross?

Love and hate really didn't apply her, unless it was between her and her seemingly split personality.

Life and death wasn't a choice at this point, not with Shikamaru sitting next to her, _believing_ in her.

So than we come to option number three.

Her sanity and the visions that she saw, that seemed to be the best line to cross. Not the easiest, but the best.

And she was hell-bent on crossing back over to her sanity.

**~Breakdown~**

**Thank you for reading! Leave a review and tell me what you think, I love hearing from people.**

**All confusion will be explained in the next chapter when we find out what exactly happened on "the" mission. Also I am sorry that this chapter bounced around so much, but remember; Ino isn't exactly 'okay' at this moment. Also this takes place after the war but Neji and Lady Tsunade are still alive.**

**Love & Always,**

**~Rivendell**


	2. The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner

Okay, so last chapter was an overview of what will eventually take place. The first part of this chapter takes place before the actual plot of the story, maybe a week or two before the mission that went wrong.

Just thought I would let you people know so no one is confused about this or that and blah, blah, blah.

Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me.

**The Thinning Line Between**

**Chapter One: The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner**

They were only three days away from Konoha.

Only three more days until the four of them would be home. Well five if they were counting Akamaru, who was basically considered a person by Kiba and the others, but Ino digressed. She was ready to be home after the long mission on the outskirts of the Land of Fire.

But as of right now they were stopped at a small café per Kiba's suggestion, in no real hurry to return. They weren't due back home for another week, the mission wasn't quite as hard as Lady Tsunade had assumed. It was a mission for maybe two people, but four made it easy.

The only thing that Ino, had too do was find a man who had been raping and murdering women, and then eliminate him. All with the help of Shikamaru Nara, Naruto Uzumaki, and Kiba Inuzuka, it had been a breeze.

Ino couldn't help but think about what had happened during the mission, and so she did, with only the laughter of the three boys to become background music too her thoughts.

The four of them were the judge, jury, and executioner.

Kiba and Naruto were 'the judge', the evaluator. They stalked their target for a week, finding out every bit of information they could on him. Learning his habits, finding out where he liked to go, what he did.

And at the end of the week Shikamaru, Ino, Naruto, and Kiba got together and discussed how to execute the mission.

_Ino and Shikamaru shared a look. There was something Kiba and Naruto weren't saying. Something that was important, but not something anyone wanted to hear._

"_Kiba," Kiba's eyes flashed with worry as Shikamaru spoke. "Would you kindly tell us whatever it is you're trying not to say?"_

_Kiba said nothing only stared at the floor as if willing it to do something- anything._

_And than she spoke, "Kiba," he looked at her, "If this is important than tell us. You're only making this harder than it needs to be."_

_Kiba looked at Naruto for a moment, and when Naruto nodded at him Kiba spoke. "Well, you know what this guy has done, right?" Kiba looked down, "Of course you do, stupid question." He paused for an instant and then raised his eyes to meet Ino's before they darted to the floor once again, his lips curling back in a snarl. "He likes blonds." Then he turned to Shikamaru for the verdict, not needing to say the rest in order to get the point of the statement across._

Yes… Shikamaru was the jury. His decision would be final.

_Shikamaru's eyes narrowed. His hands clenched into fists. "No. That's not an option."_

Except for that time… After an hour of arguing Ino had finally made Shikamaru accept that the safest option would be for Ino to play decoy and dispose of him while the others watched to make sure nothing went wrong. He didn't like it, not that the others did either, but he didn't retaliate.

And then there was Ino.

The executioner.

_The boys were already in place when Ino walked into the bar; they were sitting at a table near the center of the room laughing and playing a game of poker, but Ino could tell they all had one eye on her. _

_When she walked past them Kiba and Naruto took a moment to catcall in order to gain the attention of the man they were after, who was situated at the back of the room._

_She had walked over too him, a smile spread across her face. And they were talking for what seemed like hours, but in reality it was no more than five minutes. And then she was running a hand up his chest, and he was smiling too. And she wanted nothing to do with the sick bastard who kept running his hand up and down her thigh, but she had to wait for the right moment otherwise things would get messy._

"_You shouldn't have sat in the dark." Ino whispered to him. He was only confused for a moment before Ino shoved the spike on the bottom of the small silver ring she was wearing into the vein at his jaw line before dragging the spike along the artery and across his throat._

_He was dead in an instant, not having a chance to cry out for help before he bled out._

_And then Ino had walked away. No one had noticed the body on the floor as she did so._

_After that no one had noticed her drop the bloody ring next to Shikamaru on the table the boys were at._

Ino ended her thoughts just as Kiba was trying to flirt with their waitress.

"So how would you like to go out with me sometime? I bet I can show you a great time." Kiba gave the girl a smirk. It was disgusting.

The girl looked horrified at the thought of going on a date with Kiba. "Sorry. I don't think you're my type."

Shikamaru and Naruto laughed at the dejected look on Kiba's face as she walked away. And Ino couldn't help but make some sort of quip towards the boys. "Damn Kiba. It looks like you're barking up the wrong tree." This only caused Shikamaru and Naruto to start another bout of laughter and Kiba to sulk, slinking down as low in his chair as was possible.

**~The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner~**

Ino blinked her eyes once, why was she thinking about that memory right now? This was neither the time nor the place for it.

Ino shook her head before glancing to her left. As usual there were two men running beside her. Unlike usual these men were no Shikamaru and Choji. Not that she disliked Akimitsu and Shinji, they were nice enough, but she was so used to hearing chips crunching and the word _troublesome_ murmured every hundred feet or so that the silence unnerved her to no end.

But silence was good right? It was when you started to hear things that you knew there was a problem.

She glanced at Akimitsu and Shinji again. They were so different from her teammates in almost every way possible.

Akimitsu was tall, at least two heads taller than her, and well built with a blonde hair the fell down over his green eyes, an a hyperactive personality that rivaled Naruto's, his right arm was covered in tattoos, which she doubted either Choji or Shikamaru would ever get unlike her.

Yes, Ino had two tattoos running vertically down her back. Not that her teammates would ever find out, as Ino now adorned a different shinobi gear than she did a year ago. A pair of black shorts that went to about half way down her thigh and an equally black sleeveless top that was tied behind her neck that cut off short, maybe two inches above the top of her shorts, paired with a pair of black boots that went to her thighs.

So no, there was no chance for either of her teammates to know that she had their names tattooed across the left side of her back. In fact the only ones who did know were Sakura, Hinata, and Temari who went with her when she got them. But yes, she had the kanji for _Shikamaru Nara_ running down parallel to her backbone with _Choji Akimichi_ farther to the right, but still on the left side of her spine, their clan symbols, respectively, resting just above their names.

Ino fought back a smile at the thought of the tattoos, remembering that when Temari had asked why she was getting them on her back she had responded with: _They both have my back anyway, might as well make it official. _She shook her head before turning her attention onto Shinji.

He was a short dark haired male; being only an inch or two taller than Ino who was quiet short herself, and he was a grouch. Not like Shikamaru, who was actually quite the playful person when you got to know him, as he would normally complain about something, but still do it with a half smile on his face. No. Shinji was always a grouch, there was nothing playful about him (Ino assumed this fact was due to his height).

Ino came to a halt mid-thought causing Shinji to slam into her from behind.

"What the hell Ino!" Shinji snarled at her while shooting her all sorts of dirty looks. Not that Ino noticed at all, she was too busy staring straight ahead, looking at a group of trees. She could have sworn that she heard a noise coming from that general direction.

Akimitsu glared at Shinji for a moment before putting a hand on Ino's shoulder. "Ino? Is something wrong?"

Ino's eyes slowly slid away from the cluster of trees to meet Akimitsu's. "No, I just… I thought I heard something." Her eyes moved back to the trees, "Just watch your steps from here on out, alright? Something doesn't feel right about this place."

Shinji snorted, not believing a word Ino said, and took a few steps forward. The agonizing scream the followed would ring through Ino's ears for the rest of her life.

A tall man was standing in front of Shinji, his hand now sticking through the smaller man's chest. Ino felt like she was going to be sick as she saw the man's hand, slick and painted red from Shinji's blood, crush the heart of her comrade. Shinji's body fell limp to the floor soon after as the strange man pulled his arm free from Shinji's chest, but not in a conventional way. Instead of pulling his arm back out the same way it went in, the man pulled towards the sky, splitting Shinji in half from the center of his chest up.

The man smirked, "Damn," He looked over at Ino and Akimitsu, "I'm going to enjoy killing you guys. Hopefully you put up more of a fight than him." He gestured with his head towards Shinji. Or, rather, what was left of Shinji.

Ino stood horror struck for a long moment, but as soon as the bizarre man took a step to the right Ino snapped back into focus. "Akimitsu," The blonde's eyes ripped away from the scene in front of them before meeting Ino's. "Watch my back." Akimitsu's eyes widened, but before he could stop her Ino had already lunged forward towards the man.

Ino pulled the katana she had strapped to her back out of its scabbard, throwing the blade high into the air Ino flicked her wrist to the right, sending the blade hurtling towards the man who had killed Shinji.

The one thing the Yamanaka clan dealt with was the mind. And Ino had surpassed even her father. Not only could she use her mind to control others she could also telepathically move any object around her just by thinking about it. No spoken jutsu required, no hand signs, but the movement of her body made the fighting smoother, the movement of the weapons she used becoming less mechanical.

The man's eyes widened for a moment and he leaped out of the way with mere seconds to spare. He wasn't quite fast enough though. In the next second Ino was in front of him, her foot slamming against his chest before she grasped a hold of his hair in her fist, bringing his head down at the same time she brought her knee up at break neck speed.

And then everything went wrong.

The man raised one of his arms and, just like Kakuzu years before, stretched the limb, shooting it through Ino's stomach where it traveled along before hitting Akimitsu through the head, effectively killing him as well.

And she could feel the blood dripping down from her stomach down to the ground. And she could hear the man in front of her laughing. And then she heard someone calling her name.

Wait… what?

"Ino, are you alright?" Ino's head snapped to the right, where she found herself staring into the green eyes of Akimitsu. But he was- Ino looked around, finding herself standing exactly where she had been just before that man had- what the hell?

What… was that?

Ino barely realized Akimitsu was still talking. "I was just asking you if something was wrong, and you looked like you were going to answer, but then you started spacing out."

Ino had no idea what was going on, but like hell she was going to take any chances. "No one move. If you do I'll make you wish you had never been born." Neither of the boys questioned her, they had seen the blonde before in interrogations and knew she wouldn't hesitate to follow through with her threat. "Watch my back."

Ino closed her eyes, murmuring something under her breath she directed her thoughts towards Lady Tsunade. _Lady Tsunade, I'm requesting a backup team be sent immediately, something's wrong._ Ino left the message as just that, also letting Lady Tsunade know that they would not be straying from their position and telling her where that position was.

When she opened her eyes again the first thing she noticed was Shinji giving her a sour look. "Are we going to keep moving or what?" He spoke bitterly, clearly not liking the fact that Lady Tsunade had placed her in charge of the mission.

Ino shook her head, "We're staying here until a backup squad arrives." Shinji's eyes widened and he opened his mouth to retaliate. "Is that a problem?" Ino spoke the words with a layer of ice coating them.

Shinji merely sneered at her, "No, not a problem at all." And then he turned away from her, grumbling under his breath about how they didn't need backup and how everything was going _fine_. But Ino wasn't taking any chances.

No matter how much Akimitsu and Shinji bothered her she would not put their lives on the line.

Besides they were only a few hours away from Konoha. They could sit tight for that long. Right?

**~The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner~**

It had been over an hour and Ino was still staring at the same group of trees as before, but clearly nothing was happening and Ino was beginning to feel like a fool for even bothering to wait. Nothing was wrong and it was all probably just her imagination anyway, or lack of sleep. Yeah, that's probably all it was. And now not only had she wasted her team's time, but also the time of whatever team Lady Tsunade had sent as backup.

And then Ino realized something.

Shinji was gone.

She didn't hear him grumbling and she also couldn't see him anywhere in the clearing. And from her spot in the tree she was sitting in she should have been able to see him in the clearing. That is… if he was even in the clearing.

Ino shook her head, he was in the clearing, he had too be. She knew that he knew that if she found out he had gone somewhere without telling her she would kill him, or he would wish she would have killed him.

Ino stood up on the branch she was perched on, her eyes scanning the clearing at the same time her mind scanned the surrounding area for any sign on chakra.

And luck seemed to be on her side that night. She found three sets of chakra including her own. She focused on the third set for a heartbeat before her eyes widened. Damn her luck! In an instant Ino formed familiar hand signs, her body promptly changed into a pile of rose petals that the wind carried over to Akimitsu, who was lying hidden behind a rock at the center of the clearing.

Ino landed next to Akimitsu in an instant, the petals changing back into flesh and blood.

Akimitsu's eyes snapped open and he opened his mouth to shout before Ino slapped a hand over the offending noise, "Don't make a sound." Ino hissed at the man. "We're being watched." Ino's hand slid away from Akimitsu's mouth and, before she could stop him, he spoke up.

"Where's Shinji?"

Ino glared at the idiot in front of her, hadn't she just told him to be quiet? Ino ripped her gaze from his, "Dead, dying somewhere, who cares?"

Akimitsu snarled at her, "He's out teammate! How can you be so-?"

He didn't even get to finish his sentence before a hand, of course it had to be a hand, shot through his head, effectively splattering Ino with what little bit of brain matter Akimitsu had inside his thick skull.

Ino twisted to the left just as a second hand flew by her, catching her right side and slicing open the skin.

Ino didn't register the pain right away as the adrenaline was flooding in. She flipped backwards and landed away from the rock, at least now she could see everywhere.

"Damn, your friends where way too easy to kill. You might want to pick a better team next-" Ino whipped around, spitting out the word 'dismantle' as she did, locking eyes with the very same man she could have sworn she saw before, and smiling as he fell to the ground, screaming in agony.

The jutsu she had used, God was it an awful one, essentially tore someone's mind to shreds, ripping them apart from the inside until they either went mental or died. There were different levels to the jutsu; she could merely give someone a headache, or, as she had done here, kill them in an instant.

And there next to his fallen body lay Shinji, or what was left of him. All she could see was a mutilated corpse that resembled Shinji.

Ino was about to turn away from the scene and wait for backup to turn up when a tentacle- was it a tentacle? It was a long black tendril that resembled a tentacle. Fuck it all! It was a tentacle- shot through the right side of her stomach before curling around her waist, said tentacle promptly dragged her somewhere off to her left. She was to busy crying out in pain to realize what was going on.

**~The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner~**

She must have blacked out for a moment because the next thing Ino knew a man was leaning over her and she was looking into a pair of cold eyes that seemed to change color every time she blinked.

She tried to move, but only let out a hiss of pain when she found one of the dark tendrils logged in her left shoulder, the one that had been twisted through her stomach was gone and she could clearly see the blood pooling around her, she needed help. Fast. Ino was sure she would bleed out in a matter of minutes.

And then she looked into the man's eyes again, they were still changing color, and opened her mouth to use the same jutsu on him as she used on his partner. Before Ino could muter a word he had smashed his fist across her jaw. "I know who you are. Yes… you who love to play the games of the mind so very much." His eyes where a deep blue color. Blink. Now they were brown. Blink. Green.

"Let's see just how much you like _my_ mind games." Ino felt sick. He murmured something Ino couldn't comprehend. "Don't worry. This won't hurt one bit." And then he pressed two fingers against her forehead, and it took Ino a moment to realize the shriek of agony she heard was coming out of her own mouth.

And then the blackness swallowed her.

**~The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner~**

Someone was talking to her.

She could hear sounds, but she couldn't tell what they were saying. All she could make out was a dull roar in her ears that drowned out everything else.

Someone was touching her.

She could feel a warm hand pressed against the flesh of her right side. Why was someone touching her? And what was going on?

She opened her eyes.

For a moment all Ino thought she was in a hospital. Because hospitals feel like death: it was all white light with nowhere to go.

And then the whiteness cleared and she saw Shikamaru crouching over her, his hands pressed against her side in an attempt to stop the blood flow. "Ino? Ino! Stay awake! Dimmit stay awake!" His eyes were wide and full of fear, and she never wanted to see his eyes like that, never. "Sakura hurry!" And Ino lifted up her arm, her fingers reaching out and caressing his jaw line, and she wasn't even sure _how_ that was possible, she couldn't feel her limbs.

And then she smiled. "Goodbye Shikamaru." And her hand fell back to the ground.

And the last thing she heard was Shikamaru screaming for help.

**~The Judge, the Jury, and the Executioner~**

**Well than. That's that! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I confused myself while writing this and didn't bother to look it over for mistakes. **

**Any thoughts? Questions?**

**Ask me.**

**I hope to update again soon, I make no promises though.**

**Needs some sleep,**

**~Rivendell**


	3. To Leave When the Wind Blows

**This part is from Shikamaru's point of view! Yay! Anyway, most of this chapter takes place just before the mission from the last chapter. Enjoy.**

**The Thinning Line Between**

**Chapter Two: To Leave When the Wind Blows**

He didn't know what he was doing anymore, it seemed like in the span of under three hours his world had been turned upside down, spiraling out of control until it couldn't be stopped, nothing was going the way it should have been and there was no way he could stop it.

"I don't like this."

Shikamaru heard Ino sigh as she flipped over so that she was resting on her stomach, her elbows propping her up on his chest so she could look him in the eyes.

"Really?" Ino cocked her head to the right, a sardonic smirk curving across her face. "I hadn't noticed," The sarcasm was all but dripping from her tongue. "It's not like you've said that several times already."

Shikamaru fought down a smile, he knew he was being irritating and that her sarcasm should have made him scoff in anger, or rather annoyance at the most, but it didn't, he would- couldn't- be mad at her when she was leaving on a mission the next day.

An 'S' rank mission…

Without him…

She was leaving without him OR Choji- because Choji was a part of their team as well-.

And why the hell was Ino being sent on an 'S' rank- _'S' rank_- mission in the first place!?

And who the _fuck_ were Akimitsu and Shinji?

No, Shikamaru did not like this, not one bit. Hell, he didn't even know Akimitsu or Shinji. He would have been all right with it if Sakura or Naruto had been going with her. Fuck! He would have been perfectly okay with Kiba going with her! But not two people he had by no means met!

Shikamaru cursed himself silently. He was being ludicrous. They weren't little kids anymore. She could take care of herself just fine. They were jounin, and they had been for almost a year now. Hell, she could kick his ass in a fight now if she really wanted too; he had no valid explanation to be concerned about her. He didn't like the feeling and she, in all probability, wouldn't be fond of his concern in any case.

He realized he must have been frowning, or at least had a displeased look on his face, when Ino poked him in the side, her finger pressing against his ribs lightly. "I'll be fine." He looked her in the eyes, an unsure look flitting across his face. "You do know that, right?"

He didn't like it, but he knew she would be fine. "Yeah, I know you will." And he prayed to every higher being he could think of to just _keep her safe_.

They sat in silence for awhile, just listening to the echo of the wind blowing through the trees, not caring about the rest of the world for a short-lived moment.

"What's the mission?"

Ino gave him a pointed look, her lips pressing into a firm line, "We aren't supposed to tell people what our missions are Shikamaru." And then she turned her head away from him, but stayed next to him nonetheless.

He raised an eyebrow at her, a smirk spreading across his face. "So? When has that stopped us before?" He saw her bite back a smile, that rule had never stopped them before. Not once since they became teammates. Granted, most of the missions they had were with each other anyway. But that's beside the point.

She dropped the smile, her eyes clouding over with something dark that had him worried, "I'm sorry, Shikamaru. I-." She cut herself off as if she wasn't sure what to say. "I can't tell you."

And then the wind blew again.

And she was gone, her body turning into rose petals and scattering.

**~To Leave When the Wind Blows~**

Shikamaru walked into the apartment he shared with Ino and Choji almost two hours after Ino had disappeared. Well she didn't exactly disappear, there were only so many places she could go, it's not like she could just up and leave the day before a mission.

He had searched all of the places she might have gone.

And then he was left feeling like a fool after Hinata asked if he had checked at home.

And, wouldn't you know it, there she was.

She was in the kitchen with her back turned to him doing the dishes.

Letting out a breath he didn't know he was holding Shikamaru walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her in a hug as he did so. He had no idea why he was being so… affectionate lately, but for some reason he was. And for some reason it… it just felt right.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, his arms tightening around her. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." His grip tightened once again. "I'm just… I'm worried about you." She turned around in his arms, meeting his eyes. "I mean. What if you don't come back?" Her eyes softened slightly and she moved to speak.

"Shika-"

He cut her off quickly. "What if you die?"

"Don't think like that." She hissed at him, her pupil less eyes narrowing in contempt, the anger she felt radiating off of her. And then her voice was lighter, a joking tint to the words, "Geez, you downer." He cracked a grin.

She chuckled before wrapping her arms around him in return, burying her face in his chest. "Everything's going to be fine."

Shikamaru smiled slightly, but he could only tighten his grip on the blond and pray that she wouldn't be wrong.

**~To Leave When the Wind Blows~**

Shikamaru walked her to the gates the next day. She had reprimanded him about it on the way there, saying that he didn't need to go with her and that it was five in the morning and _how was he even awake_?

And, more importantly, where were her teammates?

"Say, Ino?"

The blond in question turned to look at him, "Yes Shikamaru?"

Akimitsu and Shinji appeared in his line of vision, "Stay safe, okay?" He didn't mean to say in as a question, but it came out that way anyway.

They stayed quiet for a moment, just watching the other boys walk closer.

"Shikamaru?"

He bit back a smile, knowing fully well that she was mocking him. "Yeah Ino?"

She turned so that she was facing him, smiled, and pulled him into a hug. "You worry too much."

Shikamaru chuckled low in his throat, his arms winding around her in return. "Yeah? Well someone has to worry about you." He knew she could feel him smiling into her hair, "You and I both know you won't do it yourself.

And then Akimitsu and Shinji were right in front of them so they pulled back reluctantly.

Well… he was reluctant.

Ino smiled at him again, "I'll see you in a few days, okay?" And he could see the other message in her eyes.

_Don't worry too much._

Then she turned around, her hair blowing around in the wind, threw him one last smile over her shoulder, and walked away.

And Shikamaru, before he could lose the nerve to do so, grabbed the two boys he had never seen before by their collars.

Neither of them made a sound, and Shikamaru fought down a laugh when he realized they were afraid. "Take care of her." And then he released them.

He had never seen two people run that fast before.

**~To Leave When the Wind Blows~**

The week seemed to go by in the blink of an eye and, before he knew it, Shikamaru was running at top speed out of Konoha's gates, Sakura and Choji flanking him.

Damn everything to Hell!

If she was hurt someone would have hell to pay!

A retrieval mission… Ino needed help for some reason or another and the three of them wouldn't be able to make it there for a little over an hour.

The thought that they wouldn't make it in time gnawed at his insides, his stomach twisting painfully, and he could almost feel his heart ripping straight out of his chest.

He shook the thought from his head; this was not the time to be worried.

Besides-

He wouldn't be late!

**~To Leave When the Wind Blows~**

Everything was wrong.

Shikamaru had managed to arrive at the large clearing before Choji and Sakura, the rage he felt propelling him forward as fast as he could push himself.

The first thing he saw were mutilated bodies laying in the clearing, two of them he recognized as Konoha shinobi.

-Akimitsu and Shinji-.

The third must have been an enemy. Strangely there didn't seem to be any damage done to the third man.

And then it clicked.

Ino.

Where was she?

His gaze flicked across the clearing until he spotted a dark mass laying some hundred feet away. His heart caught in his throat when he realized she wasn't moving.

Lunging across the open space he fell to his knees next to her, his hands immediately moving to cover the gash through her stomach that was oozing blood.

"Ino. Ino, wake up," He pleaded with the unresponsive blond, one hand moving to brush the hair from her face. Nothing happened. "Please Ino. You can't die on me now!" He waited for her to lurch up and snarl at him that she could do what ever the hell she wanted to and that he had no right to tell her what to do. "Come on, open your eyes!" He looked over his shoulder, "Sakura!" And then his eyes snapped back to her.

He swallowed thickly, a sob threatening to spill out of his mouth.

And then her eyes opened and he almost cried out in joy, almost.

And then her eyes started to fall shut again, and he was afraid that if she closed her eyes now he would never see them again. "Ino?" She didn't respond to the sound of his voice. "Ino!" He tried again, this time her blue eyes flitted over to meet his. "Stay awake!" It didn't seem like she heard him, her eyes started to fall shut again, "Dammit stay awake!" He didn't care about the fact that he was acting like a maniac or that Sakura and Choji still hadn't made it to the open stretch of grass. All that mattered was that she kept breathing.

And _fuck_ he felt like _screaming_! He whipped his head around, finally seeing his two teammates running into the clearing. And he opened his mouth, think the words would come out angry and spiteful, "Sakura hurry!" No, his voice sounded desperate and broken, like he was ripping apart at the seams.

He sounded afraid.

And then he looked back at Ino, her eyes meeting his in an instant, shocking him slightly. And it shocked him even more when her arm raised itself off of the ground, her hand moving to rest along his jaw line. Her thumb brushed across his cheek several times. Shikamaru opened his mouth to say something, but the words were caught in his throat, suffocating him.

And then she was smiling at him.

And Shikamaru couldn't help but think that, even covered in blood and laying half dead in the middle of nowhere, she was beautiful.

And he couldn't lose her!

"Goodbye Shikamaru." And her hand fell from his face.

And she stopped breathing.

"Sakura!" And then the pink haired medic was shoving him out of the way, and she was trying to heal the dying girl in front of them. It was in that moment that Shikamaru realized just how much blood she had lost, it was pooling around her; the grass was sticky and stained a dark crimson color.

And the smell of iron hit him hard. The sick, metallic aroma curling its way through him until it hit the back of his throat, making him feel sick.

And there was nothing he could do about it.

Absolutely _nothing_.

And then something cool brushed across his skin. And with a sick grimace he knew what it was. An insane laugh built up in his throat and threatened to spill out for the world to see.

The wind was blowing.

And she was leaving with it.

**~To Leave When the Wind Blows~**

**Well… This chapter is… yeah.**

**Hope you enjoyed.**

**Let me know what you think.**

**Embarrassed,**

**~Rivendell**


	4. Colorblind

**I'm back! Yay! Been so long! Well, this chapter happens after the prologue. Yeah, this story will be skipping around a bit. Chapter inspired by Colorblind by Counting Crows. Be ready for a long authors note at the end. I feel the need to give a valid reason for my disappearance.**

**The Thinning Line Between**

**Chapter Three: Colorblind**

Ino wasn't quite sure when everyone else had entered the flower shop. One moment she had been on the floor with Shikamaru, just taking comfort in the fact that he was there and that he was _real_, unlike so many other things in her life, and the next thing she knew she was sitting on a _grey_ cabinet that was in front of a shelf covered in black and white glass flower pots laughing at something funny Kiba had said that she couldn't remember for the life of her.

That's always a lovely way to start the day. No clue how you got there or how the world became so fucked up. It was like the Armageddon, the world was covered in a blanket of ash, all foul smelling and grey.

She had never liked the color grey. It reminded her to much of death, more so than the color black did. Grey was an intermediate color between black and white, a neutral or achromatic color, meaning literally a color without color. It was the color of a cloud-covered sky, of ash and of lead. Grey was the color of conformity- not having any personality of its own, it adapts to any other color. It will look either dark or light, depending upon the color next to it. Grey is the color most associated with boredom, solitude and emptiness. It is associated with rainy days and winter. Pain, necessity, guilt and misery. A color merely there for these who have lost sight of the color around them.

Grey is for those who are colorblind.

Ino felt like she had become colorblind. Everything was suddenly black and white, and she wasn't even sure when it had happened, or if it did happen. That is, when the world lost its color…When the world had been bleached out and left to dry like some sort of old blanket.

Or… maybe it was her who had lost the color. Not that it made a difference when all you could see was a thousand shades of grey that threatened to consume you, swallowing you whole in the darkness of what was once light.

She was sick of seeing shades of grey. She was sick of seeing the varying shades of a single worn and washed out color. She wanted to see color. Fuck, she even wished she could see red, a color of desire and war and love and blood.

There was so much blood…

Things were changing so quickly. That or she just wasn't changing quickly enough. She couldn't tell.

And she had to have lost her sense of time because the next thing she knows Naruto's energetic voice is penetrating through the walls of her mind like a ray of sunlight and all she can think of is the color yellow.

She slams back into awareness thinking of the color of the sun just in time to hear Naruto's question.

"So, Ino…" He looks uncertain, as if he's afraid he might break her with his words, something he doesn't want to do, because she's his friend and he never wants to be the cause of his friend's pain, "How are you holding up?" He asks the question lightly, knowing that the majority of the people in the room don't know the full extent of what had happened on the mission. Everyone else just thinks her strange behavior is due to the fact that she witnessed two of her teammates being killed and was almost killed herself.

She took a moment to glance around the room, assessing the faces that she sees to know just what it is that she can say. Shikamaru and Choji. That was a given, there was no way they wouldn't be there. Naruto and Sakura. Also a given considering Naruto was speaking to her and Sakura was her best friend. And Kiba and Hinata. Less obvious, but she wasn't surprised.

With the added two people in the room that were in the dark on the entire situation she couldn't answer Naruto with a sly remark on how she wasn't seeing people anymore.

Oh, wait. She couldn't say that anyway. She had just seen her father earlier that day. Or, she assumed it was that day. She froze for a moment, how long had it been? She had been blanking out more than usual lately and that fact scared her more than she would ever let on.

"Naruto," His name felt like ashes on her tongue, her mouth was too dry. "What day is it?"

Naruto's eyes softened slightly, whereas Kiba and Hinata's narrowed in confusion and worry. "It's the twentieth Ino." That cut through her like a hot knife.

It had been a week. It had been _over_ a week. She had completely blanked out on an entire week of her life. Unless it wasn't even the same month, which she prayed it was. She would know if it had been a month, right? She couldn't have blanked for that long. And she cursed herself for having to ask, but she needed to know. She swallowed thickly, the words tasting like poison in her mouth "And the month?"

Before Naruto could answer her Shikamaru cut him off and that's when she realized he had moved so that he was standing next to her. "It's still September Ino." He looked her straight in the eye knowing exactly what it was she was asking. Knowing _why_ she was asking. "Its only been a week." And all she could do was nod and pray that she wouldn't lose another week.

That man may have taken her sanity, but she would be damned before she let him take away her life. She had too many people she cared about to just let him take everything away from her. She refused to let him.

She _refused_.

She turned to Shikamaru and gave him a small, grateful smile. Silently thanking him for understanding.

And he smiled right back at her.

And she was lost in his smile for a moment, knowing that this- this moment- was real. Because her mind was damaged, and she could hardly tell real from fake, but, Shikamaru's smile wasn't something she could be tricked into seeing. Something so small and yet so _perfect_ couldn't just be created by her mind to fool her.

And then Kiba ruined the moment.

"Ugh! You two are doing it again!" Kiba's whine seemingly shattered whatever peace of mind Ino had found in that moment.

Ino turned to look at Kiba, a sharp look piercing him in place. "Doing what, exactly Kiba?" Ino had to bite her tongue to hold in the laugh that threatened to bubble out of her throat at the sight of Kiba's horrified face.

Kiba managed to stutter out a few incoherent words before making a whining sound in the back of his throat that sounded similar to the noise a scolded puppy would make. Ino couldn't hold her laughter in any longer as soon as she noticed Kiba shuffle slightly so that he was half way hidden behind Hinata.

How brave Kiba. Let the shy, quiet girl be your human shield. The sound of her laugh seemed to ease the tension that was stuck within everyone, and suddenly everyone else was laughing uncontrollably as well. Ino almost stopped her laughter as soon as she realized that this- this was the first time she had actually laughed since the mission, this was the first time she had really laughed. Not a bitter chortle or a slight chuckle. No.

This was a real laugh.

And in that moment she couldn't have been any happier.

**~Colorblind~**

_Ino sighed again and Shikamaru's grip around her shoulders noticeably tightened, showing that he wasn't going anywhere. Not anytime soon. Not ever._

_ The two of them sat in silence foe several heartbeats, not moving, not speaking, just drinking in the fact that the other was still breathing. Both afraid that if they broke the silence they would realize it was all just a dream._

_ They were drowning in the others heartbeat._

_ And they didn't care._

_ And in that moment, just suffocating in everything that was Shikamaru, Ino realized something._

_ She turned to face him, looking at the curve of his jaw for a second, "Shikamaru…" I love you._

_ He turned and met her gaze, dark eyes shinning with something she didn't recognize, "Yeah, Ino?" _

_ She only smiled and shook her head. "Never mind, it's nothing important." She wouldn't drag him down with her. Moreover… she wasn't even in her right mind over ninety percent of the time. _

_ She loved him, but she wouldn't burden him with that knowledge._

_ Besides… he was smart. He should be able to figure it out eventually._

_ Hopefully..._

**~Colorblind~**

Ino wasn't sure how long the seven of them had just sat there and talked- laughed- like nothing had ever happened. Everything was the way it should have been in that moment and Ino honestly thought things were getting better. Things were getting so much better.

She was starting to see the colors again, the grey and black and white were finally leaving. As soon as the piece of sunlight that was her friends entered the grey walls that were her mind everything was illuminated by the colors.

She was seeing the world through better eyes. Through the eyes she use to have.

And then Asuma walked in.

And he looked just like he did in the days before he died, green jounin vest worn proud, a cigarette hanging loosely from his lips, and a smirk spread across his face.

And he was looking straight at her. His eyes piercing her flesh like knives, and it felt like he was actually there. It felt like he was finally home.

But he wasn't real.

She wasn't stupid. She knew he was dead. She had watched him die and had mourned his death the same as her two teammates. She knew this was all some trick or memory that her mind made up just to cause her hell, and she wouldn't fall for it. She wouldn't fell the joy of him being there only for it to be ripped away cruelly out from under her.

Asuma sighed, "You're seeing things again." Ino bit her lip as he said that, feeling very much like a child being reprimanded for something they did wrong.

"I know." There was no point in her denying it. From the corner of her eye she saw Kiba give her a worried glance, confused as to who she was talking to.

Asuma took a long drag from his cigarette, tilting his head back and making a smoke ring when he blew out. "I'm dead."

Ino just barely held back a sob, "I know you are." And then Shikamaru was in front of her, his hands on her shoulders, and he was talking to her, but she couldn't hear a word he said so she merely turned so she was looking Asuma again.

He looked sad, as if it physically hurt him to be the cause of her pain at that moment. "None of this is real," she didn't bother answering this time. She knew fully well that nothing that he said was real. It wasn't necessarily lies, but it was words that would never come out of his mouth. This was all just something her mind made up as it went along. She only blinked and continued to stare at her teacher. Asuma smiled slightly before pushing himself up and away from the wall he was leaning against. "You need to wake up." The sad look that clouded his face nearly broke her heart. And she just wanted to stop seeing these faces. She didn't want to see the faces of the dead! She couldn't handle it anymore. She couldn't handle the faces and the words they spouted that pierced through her heart like a cold metal rod.

She needed to wake up?

_Wake up_…

She could do that.

And with one swift movement Ino swung her head back, slamming it into one of the glass pots behind her. She heard a scream rip from Sakura's throat and, through the bright lights dancing across her vision, saw the horrified look spread across Shikamaru's face before everything went black.

At least the grey was gone.

**~Colorblind~**

**I am so sorry this chapter is so late! My computer completely crashed before I could even start this chapter! Plus I became preoccupied with ****Purple Hearts**** check that one out if you get the chance. I really wish I could have made this longer, but I feel like this was all I could have added to this chapter.**

**To tell you the truth, I'm a bit disappointed with it.**

**All of this was written today. March 30.**

**Tired and feeling lousy,**

**~Rivendell**


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